So much going on....

Ever have a child come up to you and say something along the lines of "I admire you" then you think OMG I need to get my act together or why?? Yeah, that happened. That's powerful!

Ever have someone you loved and trusted your whole life betray you along with friends? I did. I will make an example out of this person since it's a touchy subject. They go to a private Christian college, practice everything Christ related so certain people begin to think they're perfect. Don't fall for it, only God is perfect.

Before I go on, I wanted to say this. I see people blaming Christ and Christians for this but it is, in no way, His fault. Humans make mistakes no matter what race, religion, gender etc...God is LOVE that's what He teaches but we do fall. I fall hard, but in a different way than this person/people. No matter what people do to you, God would never leave you.

It starts with one... (ADD kicked in and "In the End" is playing in my head now...). sorry, ONE misread email, message, however you do it. The person is sensitive and attacks back. God's still working on me so I attack back. Honestly, my anger comes from pain or attention seeking (I will admit that). This person decided to block me out of...everything. We were best friends basically before the marriage. Summer road trips, goofing off, having fun. If you're feeling me here, I'm with you.

I tend to do the "tough love" thing. If I see someone going for a dangerous but important life I tend to butt in and 'test' them. Then mess up and lose them...or they lose it, I'm not sure.

I realize that you say you have been thru a lot and been a lone alot- guess what- you are not the only one.

Then share your testimony! No one knows what I've been through but God. I'll let B speak here..He's better at those words lol:





Thank you to Bizzy much love and respect! <---has impacted me a lot <3
"they wouldn't listen if we did in Morse code..."

Who is Christy and Why?

Hey I'm Christy. My story goes deep and the pain I've felt from life is too. When I see kids go through what I went through, it's heartbreaking. I see yall on the streets, some secretly wanting someone to talk to, some wasted or just pissed off. That was me not long ago and still struggle with those things (won't go into detail yet, that would take forever) today.
I know that "fight or flight" panic and all the crazy that comes with it. Growing up, I was the "bad kid" or trouble. Years of abuse and negligence has made me grow stronger and more compassionate about speaking out. I've had people go "you're a girl, you look 16 what do you know?" yeah, I'm pretty small physically. Here are some facts:

-I was abused physically as a kid and teen
-abused mentally and verbally to this day
-I keep fighting
-I've been shot at
-I've been left for dead
-locked up and kicked down by my family who constantly judge everything
-ignorance pisses me off
-was an equestrian (top 10 in the state) for 10 years. Was abused there when my instructor thought that if she beat me/screamed at me she could control me and make money off of me. She lost. I saw one of my friends die, gave my horse to a friend and left.
-took up tae kwon do and kick boxing to release anger
-was used against my will when anti depressants started getting popular as a minor
-over medicated and became severely sick
-more I'm hesitant to put here lol

I've watched too many people die and NOT deserve any of it. I have a friend in prison for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. He's 24 and may get the death penalty (praying that won't happen). I'm against that. God chooses who stays and who goes, not man.

I credit Christ for saving me many times. I know, some people think it's cliche or don't believe it but I do and if you knew me, you would to. All of this inspires me and makes me stronger.

@way2strong